If you are new to vibrator play, keep an open mind; there are lots of reasons why you should consider using one.
They were invented in the mid 1800's and were originally used by doctors in the days when sexual frustration was viewed as an illness, prior to 1920 (more on this below in A Not So Brief History).
Vibrators / massagers are an extremely useful tool that work quickly to assist relaxation, open blood vessels, increase physical arousal and enhance sexual pleasure in both men and women. They can help both sexes to orgasm and are also used to help harvest sperm in men that are unable to ejaculate.
"A tool?", I hear you ask - Yes, I put them in the same basket as back scratchers, loofahs and toothbrushes, offering both pleasurable sensations and health benefits to the user.
Scientific Research on Vibrator Use
There is scientific evidence that supports vibrator use. A research study published in the Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy in 2010 showing that vibrator use among women who held negative beliefs didn't have the same relationship to boosted sexual function as those who held positive beliefs (Herbenick, D. et al., 2010).
Two separate studies, on mostly middle-aged, white and educated men and women showed that 53% of American women and 45% of men had used vibrators in their lifetime (and that's in a country where vibrators are still illegal in some states!). Women with positive beliefs who had used vibrators in the past 30 days reported relatively higher levels of arousal, lubrication, orgasm and sexual satisfaction, and lower levels of pain during sex than those who hadn't (Herbenick, D. et al., 2009).
Interestingly, in a partnership study, 70% of men, compared to 37% of women disagreed or strongly disagreed, with the statement that men are threatened or intimidated by sex toys. Vibrator use by a partner was related to sexual satisfaction, particularly when a woman's partner knew she had been using vibrators and felt positively about it (Herbenick, D. et al., 2011).
A similar finding was reported in a study of same-sex female couples published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine in 2011. Women who used vibrators recently with other women had higher sexual functioning scores than women who reported no vibrator use or vibrator use only during masturbation. When vibrators are not incorporated into partnered activities, it is possible that the non-vibrator partnered experiences are compared and they are less satisfied as a result (Schick, V., 2011).
Herbenick noted "It's not just the vibrator use but being able to share those parts of your sexuality with your partner that matters."
I love this description by Dr Myrtle Wilhite of www.sexualityresources.com:
In a nutshell, vibrators cause sheer stress when applied to the sides of blood vessels. As the vibrator moves to and fro, the pressure applied causes the underlying tissue to move to and fro as well. When a blood vessel experiences sheer stress, it causes dilation, kind of like a pressure valve release mechanism. A blood vessel doesn't "know" where sheer stress comes from, it only biochemically responds to it.
So vibrators, when applied to a near proximity to blood vessels, form gentle sheer stress on the blood vessels, leading to dilation which equals greater blood flow and engorgement of the clitoris or penis. That response is reported back to the lower spine and brain, and in most circumstances the brain will register it as pleasurable, which leads to positive reinforcement. Thus vibrators directly impact the sexual arousal cycle through direct stimulation ("peripheral activation" vs. "cognitive arousal").
A not-so brief history
The history of the vibrator goes back hundreds of years and they were originally invented as a medical treatment. Since ancient times, as early as the 4th century, Roman and Greek philosophers and healers through the ages have written about ‘hysteria' in women.
Hysteria
Hysteria was considered to be a disease of the womb, which caused irritability, discomfort and a general malaise, which today we might consider sexual frustration. For over a thousand years, the most common and effective treatment for hysteria was therapeutic genital massage, which was administered by a doctor or midwife.
It appeared to be a chronic condition and patients required regular therapy to alleviate their symptoms. The massage was administered using aromatic oils and continued until the women reached a state of "hysterical paroxysm" (orgasm), after which her condition miraculously improved.
This was considered a medical treatment and was utterly respectable - there was no shame attached to it. In fact, doctors often encouraged unmarried women and nuns in particular to go for regular therapy.
Tired doctors seek wonder tool
During the 19th century, the genital massage business was booming with doctors believing that more than 70% of women suffered from hysteria and required treatment.
Unfortunately, with the massage treatments all being done by hand, this was very consuming, of both time and energy. Some patient took up to an hour to reach paroxysm. They needed a device to assist them so they could increase their productivity and process more patients in a day. Thus the vibrator was born.
There evidence that vibrators were being used medically from around 1860 and all sorts of interesting designs were invented. They were powered in ingenious ways - some were water- driven, some used foot pedals, some had hand cranks and some were even steam-powered.
"The Chattanooga"
The Chattanooga is a particularly famous steam-powered model; it stood nearly 2m tall and required two men to operate it. The engine room was next door to the doctor, where the men shoveled coal into the furnace, carefully monitoring the temperature, pressure, and thrust required to drive the Chattanooga. A long arm extended from the engine into the consulting room through a hole in the wall, where the doctor administered the treatment to the grateful patient.
By 1900, battery operated models were being produced. The importance of the vibrator in a doctor's bag of tools is reflected by the fact that it was the FIFTH household appliance ever to be electrified after the toaster, sewing machine, kettle, and the fan, with the vacuum cleaner, iron and frying pan following a decade later.
Respectable "Blood Circulator"
Around this time, vibrators became available to consumers, marketed as "blood circulators" in ladies magazines and fancy department store catalogues, where they promised to restore the "youthful glow" to ladies' cheeks. They were popular gifts for many years, until they started appearing regularly in pornographic films in the 1920's. Respectable society shunned them and they dropped from view for nearly 40 years until the feminist movement of the 60s and 70s embraced them as a political symbol.
Approaching Vibrator Play
It is always recommended that you use an appropriate lubricant with vibrator / sex toy play (See Product FAQ).
Take your time and breathe
Take a few deep breaths before you begin using a vibrator, and focus on the feeling of relaxation that occurs as you exhale. This tunes your focus into your body, sets a relaxed pace for your exploration and brings your mind into the present. This state can greatly improve your experience of pleasure and your orgasms.
There can be a tendency to head straight for the clitoris or penis but often it is better to take your time and build up anticipation gradually. Women's arousal is often much slower than men's, so start with a low vibration or a less intense rhythm and take a luxurious and meandering path to the genitals, spending some time getting used to the sensations and stimulating other parts of your body, exploring undiscovered erogenous zones on your way.
Maintain slow, relaxed deep breaths as you go. This type of breath and exploration can gradually charge your body with sexual energy. Think of it as building up fuel for your orgasm later. Focus on the rhythm of your breathing and notice any waves of pleasure you feel in your body, even the small ones.
Vibrator Techniques
When you arrive at the clitoris or penis, begin by applying the vibration to the surrounding areas, like the labia, or lips, or on the shaft of the penis. Many women find one side of their clitoris more sensitive than the other. Others dislike the feeling of direct clitoral stimulation at any time.
Some men dislike vibration on the head of the penis, but like stimulation around their testicles or perineum. Take your time to experiment. You can buy vibrators with a variety of speeds and pulses, in different shapes and sizes.
Pulse the vibrator backwards and forwards on your genitals, at the same time rocking your pelvis back and forth. If you bend your knees you will find it easier to create a gentle rocking motion. See how it feels if you contract your pelvic floor muscles (Do Kegel Exercises) at the same time.
Experiment with different positions. Many people feel most relaxed on their back, but you can use a vibrator in any position. Try putting a pillow under your buttocks to improve your reach and comfort. If you have chosen a waterproof vibe, you might like to try it in the bath or shower.
You may find that as you become more excited you want to insert a vibrator, dildo or finger, to give you a gratifying feeling of fullness. I have found silicone or elastomer dildos are lovely because they are flexible, warm and conduct body heat, as well as being body-safe (See also Product FAQ). Using two lubricated fingers to apply gentle pressure and trace circles around the vaginal entrance can also feel extremely pleasurable.
People who experience pain with penetration can find using a small or modestly sized insertable vibrator or dildo can be a helpful warm up, before they attempt penetration with a penis.
Safe Sex
If you are not with a fluid-bonded partner and you want to share your vibrator or sex toy, it is wise to place a condom over it. Silicone toys that are washed thoroughly between users are safest for sharing, as they are non-porous.
It is never safe to alternate from the anus to the vagina. Use a condom or have different toys for each place. It is essential that you don't transfer bacteria from your anus to your vagina, as this can lead to infection. Again, silicone toys are recommended for anal play.
During Sex
If you and your partner are interested in experimenting with using the vibrator during sex, try a variety of different positions. Doggy style can offer great access, as can having your legs up high in the missionary position.
Both partners can find vibration electrifying. You don't necessarily need to apply direct clitoral stimulation – placing the vibrator on the pubic bone can give amazing vibration through the entire genital area. And don't forget about your partner's preferred pleasure zones.
